This story is not designed to be read from beginning to end – if you did, it’d be as confusing as a press release from Jacqui Lambie. Unlike normal boring books like Harry Potter or Fifty Shades of Grey, YOU will make the decisions that guide this story along – who knows where it will end?
You are a ten year old boy or girl (delete according to preference). Your interests include soccer, fairy costumes and trying to make friends, but none of these are relevant to the story. They’re just in here to add a bit of light and shade in case there are any reviewers reading.
It is a beautiful morning. The sun is streaming in through your bedroom windows, and you jump out of bed, immediately stepping on a piece of LEGO. Deduct 1 point of Strength. But even that agonising pain lancing through your foot is not enough to dampen your excitement – today you are going to be visiting the Royal Easter Show! You limp downstairs, where your parents are waiting with big smiles on their faces.
“Wakadoo!” you shout, in the author’s best guess at current youth slang. “I’m so excited!” Your parents nod and give you the thumbs up, before telling you to brush your teeth.